This blog was not suppose to be a ranting blog at all it was actually suppose to be a way for me to see if my writing was any good I was going to put up short-stories screenplays and any other time of writing I wished but today my mother called being the bitch she is and I needed a place to vent without feeling bad for the way I feel about her. I’ve tried to see the good and tried to forgive and forget but it doesn’t work its only so long a snake can hide its fangs and I’m tired of being bitten. So this is me just spilling out all the venom in hopes that I have a lighter burden on me lets hope this works people I need it to work.
My mother is a fucking cunt I know yeah she gave me birth but since then bitch been close to no help. Since I was five she told me I wasn’t good enough change your voice stop walking like that fix your attitude can’t do that. She mocked me for not tying my shoes properly yet she never taught me. She plays all innocent and sweet trying to act as if I was the bad guy mean to her for no reason at all when in truth she created the monster she hates so much. We have those moments where she is a mother that I actually like her as a person and when I decide to finally let her in bitch screws me the fuck over hard too and takes luggage so I don’t ever have my guard down when it comes to her. I have insomnia and can’t sleep half the fucking time unless I watch tv for fucking hours and sleep due to fucking exhaustion so I like to smoke a blunt and I drink like a fish out of water and I don’t apologize for it. I don’t think everyone is fit to be a parent thats why I’m pro-choice my mother made me pro-choice cause she is such a shitty example of how parents are to their kids. She is all about appearances I mean this woman should have been a politician or something the way she cares what people think so much I can credit the little voice in my head that says oh people are here don’t do this or that to her because she never cease. I have no fucking self-esteem she took that all away from me isn’t family suppose to protect one another well mine is an exception I guess. Her only weapon is telling my father its her only one because he pays for everything and she knows using it as some sort of scare tactic to scare her bitches straight. Its my theory that she thinks of us her kids as her bitches whom she can run and we can’t say anything thats why I think we but heads because I don’t like that. She is like a dictator who believes she has absolute power over us but she doesn’t I am sick and fed up of her tired of being around her. My goal since I was young has to been to fake my fucking death I saw it in movie and always wanted to do it so I can get a way from her but one thing she taught me if you ain’t got money your screwed needed money to survive in this world I think thats been the hesitation of me leaving this place the money if I had I would buy her out of my fucking life and have kids just so they wouldn’t interact with her. I am tired of being the kid who never gets a break people bother me all the time make cracks about my weight or my voice and I don’t care it bothers me but what can I do if my mother does the same thing I give up and give in tired of fighting something has to give.